I have literally been gagging. This show makes me retch. And I’m a nurse, so you know what it takes for me to have to work at suppressing the gag reflex? A lot. (And just so you know, smiling suppresses the gag reflex. A really handy little tip for debriding an infected wound or cleaning the fridge.)

So anyway, we’re sitting and watching the show Hoarders, and there was one about a woman hoarding expired and rotting food. OMG. Microbiology background here, I was grinning (see the above tip) and trying not to think about the petri dish that is that woman’s house. And also making mental notes about taking more stuff to Goodwill. Like my entire basement.

(So I have to admit that I’m an anti-hoarder and a cleanfreak/germaphobe- everything is either useful and has its place, sentimental and stored, or gone. And I don’t think that much is sentimental. I’m a little freakish about it, which is why the show Hoarders sucks me in! Keep that in mind as you read on.)

But anyway, we’re watching the show and at one point Marmot leans back, and says well I think we’re okay Honey, you’ve got hoarding tendencies but we’re alright.

WTF?

And yes, that’s a direct quote from me.

Upon hearing that I demanded to know where in the hell he got that idea sweetly asked him to please elaborate on why he would think that.

He tells me I’m a packrat, and that my (home) office is messy and I really need to get a handle on it, throw more stuff away.  Huh. As if the three bags of Goodwill that he hauled to the truck two days ago didn’t register.

Furthermore, this is coming from the man who has the Man Room which features a sushi-making kit, along with clothes that he hasn’t worn since high school, deer antlers, and a reindeer costume from the 3rd grade.

Hoarding ‘tendencies’, seriously. I rest my case.