I have a strange relationship with my Mom…I know this. And if I wasn’t aware of it, all it takes is getting off the phone with my Mom and Marmot telling me, I could hear you all the way upstairs, you told your Mom she was full of shit and almond paste?? He just doesn’t get it. Neither do I honestly, but its Mom and I.

We have silly and weird and close relationship now (we can make each other giggle to the point of snorting), but Mom and I had the typical teenager vs. parent ugliness, and then a couple of years where we didn’t really talk at all. It wasn’t until I married someone a lot like my Dad that my Mom and I started to bond again. Right now I can truthfully say that my Mom is my best friend.

I know not everyone is so lucky to have that kind of relationship with their mother. But if you have that kind of relationship, or want to, here are some things that I’ve learned about being best friends with your Mom.

1) Honesty really is the best policy. I always wanted my Mom to be impressed with me, even to the point of covering up anything that I knew would disappoint her. But FYI, lying is not a good thing for a relationship and it wasn’t until I was straight with my Mom that things improved. Believe me, Mom already knows your faults, weaknesses, all the parts of your personality that are unattractive– and loves you anyway. What more could you ask for in a friend?? Honesty is what keeps the relationship authentic.

2) Be what you want to get in the relationship. Friendships can be a transient thing (I’ve realized that I’ve had many ‘best friends’ over my lifetime) but the biggest reason why friendships don’t last is because one or both parties are not getting what they want out of the friendship. How often does that happen because we’re not giving what we want to get? I want a supportive friend who can help me keep my life in perspective, give me advice when things come up (fights with Marmot, purse dilemmas), sometimes a shoulder to cry on, and someone to do fun things with. That’s what I want, so that’s what I try to be in my relationship with my Mom.

3) Mom is a person too. When it comes to our mothers, we tend to get egocentric…but Mom has dreams and goals and hobbies, outside of her kids?! I don’t know why I think its so hysterical that my Mom has non-kid hobbies and interests…her youngest is 18! But those things are what really makes my Mom a fun person to be friends with- she likes to read, scrapbook, write, and make snarky comments about skinny women…all MY interests too!! Get to know the other sides of Mom. Because you know, you’re her child…there is a decent likelihood that her interests may be yours as well!

Not every relationship is like what my Mom and I have…but these are things that don’t just apply to your relationship with Mom, but any close relationship in your life.

What is the best relationship advice you’ve ever been given…?